5 Valuable Things That Define Your Value Better Than Money!

We live in consumer society which means that you should define your value by how much stuff you have and how much money you earn. 

We live in a consumer society which means what you should define your value by how fancy your car is and if you have the latest iPhone.

We live in a consumer society so if you don’t have all the trappings of success by 30 you are a big time failure. 

I hope as you read that you got angry. And maybe you also noticed that I’ve watched a few too many Instagram reels lately. 

But really, do you think that is how you should define your value? Even if you up front reject those ideals do you secretly deep down believe them and let them guide your life? 

As a minimalist blogger I can honestly say that these consumer ideals are very hard to break free from. After all I would be lying if I said that cleaning houses for work and living with my parents at 35 didn’t make me feel like a failure when I went to my husband’s work functions. It just does, even if I know all the really good and even amazing reasons those stats are true of my life. 

In order to fight those feelings and live a simple life you have to have new ways to define your value. You have to know what defines your worth outside of the type of job you have, the type of car you drive or the number of toys you are going to die with. 

That’s what we are going to get real about in this article. How do I know my worth? How do you know your worth? Do you truly know it has nothing to do with money or things? What do you use to define your value? Let’s dig in. 

Why You Shouldn’t Define Your Value with Money and Things

First of all, why are the consumer values that say you should define your value in direct corelation to your stuff so wrong? Why do we need to escape that way of thinking?

We all know the answer. Money doesn’t make you a good person and stuff doesn’t really make you happy. A rich person can die having lived a life without purpose and someone with a lot of junk in their house can die without any family around them. 

Ultimately, the amount of money you earn and the cool gadgets you buy with it are the worst possible metric for you to define your value by because that measure of success has failed over and over again. It hasn’t worked for all the movie stars that have committed suicide or the billionaires who couldn’t pay doctors enough to find a miracle cure. Money and all the stuff it can buy just don’t live up to the hype.

So what should define your value? Better things. Things that aren’t things at all.

1: Define Your Value by Your Inner Qualities

When you are thinking about what defines your worth what kinds of things first spring to mind? I hope you don’t define your value by how much you own but I also hope you don’t define it by how you look. 

While it is important to stay healthy and have a decent body image that is not really be what defines your worth. Instead is should be the inner person of the heart, the beautiful qualities you can develop in yourself. 

Do you take time to listen to others? Are you humble? Are you always looking for ways to serve others instead of only worrying about yourself? Have you developed the quality of patience? Do you say and do kind things often? 

Beyond that, what do you like about yourself? After some deep contemplation I really like that I am intrepid and stubborn. When I find something I want to do I don’t let fear hold me back. I do it and I work really really hard to learn everything I need to learn and do everything I need to do to make it work. 

What about you? What internal qualities make you unique? Think about it because having those  amazing inner qualities is what defines you are worth.

2: Define Your Value by Your Relationships with Others

Another thing that you should define your value with is your relationships with others. Are the inner qualities you are developing drawing others to you or is something still pushing them away? If so, can you figure it out and improve?

Do you make time to do fun things with you family? When your husband, kids, parents, or friends need to talk to you do you take time to listen to them? Are you really present for them?

Are you the type of friend who is there for the bad days and not just the good ones? Do the people in your life call you when they need help with something? 

None of us are perfect. We all have times when we are worn out and that can cause us shrink away from the responsibilities of being a good friend. There are times when having manners and being kind feels like a lot of work. That might be the time you need to a little self care so are better able to care for your friends. 

The great things about using your relationships to define your value is that you can always improve. You can always find ways to be a more supportive friend or family member. 

At the end of your life people will not talk about how much time you spent at work. I hope they won’t. Instead they will talk about the time you spent them and the love you showed. 

3: What Defines Your Value? What Do You Contribute? 

So you have an amazing personality and great friends. Is that all that should define your value?

Well, what do you do all day? Hopefully you contribute to the world with your time, energy and talents. The world deserves your contribution no matter how small or meaningless it might seem to you. 

This may sound like I’m telling you that your job is what defines your self worth and haven’t I been saying that it shouldn’t? Well, not exactly. What you do defines your self worth. What you do might be your job or it might be something outside of your job. The difference is that when you define your value by your work it shouldn’t be because of your position or the amount of money you earn. It should be about how what you do at work contributes to the world. 

For example, I have three highly fulfilling jobs. They are pretty much the opposite of prestigious and only one of them really pays but they are important jobs never the less. Why? Because they all have one thing in common. They all help people. 

Beyond the work we do, your creative endeavors are also a great contribution to the world by which you can define your value. 

Think about it, when you think of the 1500s you probably think of Shakespeare, when you think of the 1400s you might think of Leonardo DaVinci and when you think of the 1960s you probably think of The Beatles. 

While you may not be a exceptional writer, painter, or musician remember this. The arts matter. Your creativity can make someone feel something. It can make them smile or laugh or feel understood. Don’t hold back. Don’t keep your creativity to yourself.

4: Define Your Value with Experiences 

The world we live is a society that accumulates stuff like homes, cars, tennis shoes and even cell phones in order to telegraph their success. They want everyone to know that they are just as cool as the hottest Hollywood Star and the biggest music artist and they show this by what they own. 

But you know what really successful people do? They go places! They have unique experiences! They learn really cool skills from experts! And most of all they take time to help others who are less fortunate. 

When you hear of someone like that you wish you could be like them don’t you? Well, knock yourself out! Within your means, do cool stuff! Start defining your worth by the experiences you engage in instead of the stuff you collect. Fill your days will memories. Become a person that makes someone else’s life better. Keep growing and learning. Save up for that big adventure you have always dreamed of.

When you define your value by experiences instead of stuff you will have a much more fulfilling life.

5: What Defines Your Worth? Spirituality

Last but that least, we all have a need to connect to something bigger than ourselves. We feel whole and at peace when we connect to a bigger purpose.

That need can only be filled by spirituality. That means you have to take time for spiritual things like reading spiritual wisdom, meditating on it, praying and giving thanks for the amazing things in your life.

It may seem outdated or ethereal but I promise when you take time to deep dive into your spirituality you will feel more peace in your life. 

Define Your Value With Better Things

I hope that this post has helped you see how you can define your value with better things than stuff. I hope it has encouraged you to see how valuable you really are, even if you don’t have all the external trappings of success. 

When you start defining your value with the things that really matter you will improve your self worth and feel the power you have for good in the world! That will help you be more productive and reach your goals. It will also help you uplift those around you.

Define your value by things that really matter and start enjoying a happy simple life!