Start Unwinding Anxiety in 3 EASY Steps! 

I have been dealing with anxiety for as long as I can remember. For a long time, I didn’t think it was a problem but a couple of years ago I became so anxious and depressed I felt like I was drowning. While I pulled myself out of that really bad spot I still find anxious thoughts and self-limiting fears controlling my life from time to time.

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That’s why I decided to listen to Unwinding Anxiety by Judson Brewer. I have to say that it’s one of the most interesting and helpful books I’ve listened to in awhile and I can see that the techniques explained by Brewer will be a big help in my effort to manage anxiety and find freedom from fearful, limiting thoughts. 

While I highly recommend that you read Unwinding Anxiety for yourself I am going to share my key takeaways so that I can absorb them more deeply and maybe help you too! 

Why Should You Start Unwinding Anxiety?

So many people deal with anxiety these days. In fact, statistics for 2024 show that 1 in 5 people suffer from an anxiety disorder, making it the most common mental illness in the United States. 

If you are like me and have dealt with anxiety all your life you may believe that it is something that you will always have to deal with. You might have tried a lot of different things to help it. I’ve tried lots of different vitamins, some of which worked. I’ve found that the most consistently helpful thing I can do is to be creative each day.

Still, these things don’t necessarily help me in the midst of an anxious thought pattern. I can still get really stressed out when I fixate on one of the things that I worry about the most and it can be really hard to stop my racing mind and pounding heart. 

Do you feel the same way? Wouldn’t it be nice te break free of your anxiety habit and start living with the freedom to do things that you are currently terrified of doing? Don’t you want to stop self-destructive habits that only make your anxiety worse? 

If all of that sounds good to you then it’s time for you to learn the three steps of unwinding anxiety. In his book, Brewer compares these 3 steps to gears on a bike. Each gear is important and each gear moves you forward! Let’s get an overview of each one now so you can break the habit of anxiety!

Step 1: Map Your Habit Loops

The first step or the first gear in unwinding anxiety is the easiest one but it’s very important. You have to start by noticing what triggers your worry, what your worry or habit is, and what the result of that worry or habit is. It’s called a habit loop and you probably have several of them. 

For example, since I had some trouble with my Jeep in the past every time I think about driving somewhere I worry that my Jeep will stall and stutter, and as a result, I tend to avoid going out if I have to drive my Jeep.

This is just one of my anxious habit loops and it’s easy to see that I fall into this anxiety habit loop nearly every day. It’s also easy to see that the result of that worry is not a positive one. 

What are your habit loops? Whenever you are feeling anxious stop and ask yourself these three questions: 

1: What triggered my anxious feelings?
2: What is my anxious thought or habit?
3: What is the result of that?

For example, do you feel overwhelmed and behind every evening when you get home? Does that make you overeat or drink resulting in numbing those feelings for a short time? 

Whatever your habit loops are they are fueling your anxiety. They could also include some self-destructive behaviors. You need to identify what they are before you can start unwinding anxiety with second and third gear. 

Step 2: Update Your Old Stories 

Now that you know what your habit loops are and you can clearly see your triggers, habits, and results you can start figuring out how to redirect or cancel them out. The first step in doing that is updating how you feel about the result or reward. 

For example, you may be stressed out so when you get home you eat a whole pizza because you think that is a comforting and numbing way to deal with the stress but is that really the result? Stop and pay attention. Does eating that pizza really feel as good as you have trained yourself to think it does? Or does it actually result in a belly ache, feelings of guilt, and weight gain that stresses you out and sends you right back into the same habit loop?

For me, with my Jeep, even when I knew the problem was gone the worry about it having a problem kept me from driving it. I reasoned that I was being responsible and careful but the actual result of my behavior was that I would avoid going out which kept me from doing a lot of things that I needed to do or would have enjoyed doing.  

When you pay attention to your habit loop and see that your anxious thoughts or habits are actually not beneficial you make them less appealing. You have been engaging in these thoughts and habits because you thought they were beneficial but now you see that they really aren’t. 

Step 3: Notice With Curiosity and Kindness 

The third gear you can use to calm your anxious thoughts and break those habit loops is curiosity. This may sound crazy but if you read Unwinding Anxiety you will see how it works. 

Basically, when we have negative feelings like fear, anxiety, worry, panic, or sadness we REACT. We want to run away from, avoid, or numb those feelings. We eat a lot, drink a lot, or stay home. Our triggers become something to avoid and by avoiding them we put ourselves in a prison of our own making.

But what if instead of running we just started being curious about those feelings? When you feel anxious you can stop and say to yourself “Hmmm? I am feeling anxious. Where is this feeling in my body? What does it feel like?” Then you can take some deep breaths, think good thoughts, and let that feeling slowly release out of your body. 

In the book Unwinding Anxiety, Judson Brewer explains several techniques for calming your anxious feelings through mindful awareness of them. When you use mindfulness to reduce anxiety you learn that negative feelings come and then they pass. You don’t have to run from them.

I actually had the opportunity to employ some of these techniques when I woke up stressed out about my Jeep again. And guess what? Instead of spiraling into a whirlwind of stress and bargaining to stay home today I broke the habit loop and went back to sleep!

Start Unwinding Anxiety With The 3 Gears 

You too can break the habit loop, get past the feelings that have been holding you back, stop self-destructive habits, and start unwinding your anxiety!

Read Unwinding Anxiety by Judson Brewer and learn how to use all three gears to identify your habit loops, reassess the results of those habits, and help yourself through the feelings of anxiety with mindfulness, curiosity, and kindess. 

We all want a happy simple life so let’s get rid of anxiety and find freedom!

PS: The Jeep started acting up again and I was so done with that habit loop and all that anxiety so I just got rid of it! Sometimes anxiety is trying to tell you to change something in your life. I feel so good driving a car that runs every day!