Life is expensive and complicated these days! Maybe as a result of the pandemic money is tight. Perhaps there is crazy high rent in the area where you live.
For whatever reason, you may find yourself moving home.
Is it okay to move back in with your parents?
What do you do when you have to consider moving back home to save money?
How can you make moving back in with your parents a good thing for everyone? How can minimalism help you to succeed?
Let’s answer all your questions! In this article you will learn how to make moving back home a positive thing. Learn how to keep the peace and make moving back in with your parents stigma and drama free!
What Should You Do When You Are Moving Back Home?
Read these tips for moving in with family from someone who has been there!
- The less stuff you have the easier it will be to move in with your parents.
- Get rid of stuff you will not need in the household.
- Learn to want less and limit shopping.
- Make an agreement on finances.
- Share the work of caring for the home.
- Make space and respect it.
- Show respect for eachother and prioritize peace over preference.
Moving Back In With Your Parents -Why we did it.
There are many reasons for moving back home in your 30s or 20s or any time really.
During the pandemic, more young people are moving back in with their parents than at any time since the great depression! That means, if you are moving back home with your parents you are far from alone.
For us, it was mutually beneficial. My dad and I both run our own businesses that were affected by the pandemic.
My parents live in a house with lots of extra space. We lived in a 300 square foot studio apartment. It seemed like the obvious decision to alleviate stress for both of us by combining our resources.
That doesn’t mean it was easy. We have a very good relationship with my parents. We realized that moving in together had the potential to stress that.
Also, I was very attached to our little place and our little routines.
Needless to say, we made the move anyway. We have now been living in my parents’ home for nearly a year. Let me tell you what we have learned and why it has helped me to simplify my life even more!
When You’re Moving Back Home Having Less Stuff Makes Moving Easier
The first challenge in moving in with my parents was pure logistics. How are we going to fit all our stuff and all of their stuff into the same house? Both of our houses are full already.
Fortunately, we already lived in a 300 square foot studio apartment so we didn’t have a great deal of stuff to move.
I have never been happier to be a minimalist. Having less stuff meant that we did not feel that we were downsizing much and it made the moving process a lot less stressful.
The less stuff you already have the easier it will be to move so if you are already trying to be a minimalist you just found another great benefit of the lifestyle!
Declutter More For Moving Back Home
Even though we lived pretty simply in our studio apartment there was still stuff we didn’t need.
For example, I knew that my mom had every kitchen gadget I would ever need so my kitchen stuff was not going to be needed anymore.
It was a challenge to let this stuff go though. What if we move back out?
As I had no definite plans to move out I tried to fight this feeling as much as possible. I kept certain items that were essential and that my mom didn’t have. I also kept a few essentials for when we do move out, but I got rid of most of my kitchen stuff.
Now I’m thinking I might just let go of that box of “essentials” too.
I also let go of a lot of furniture we wouldn’t need or be able to fit in our new space including my dining set which I had just refinished.
At the time it was difficult but in hindsight, I’m glad I don’t have anything sitting around in storage for “one day”. It makes my future a lot more flexible!
My parents also had to let go of some stuff. They had not only possessions from their 40 years of marriage but also several things from my grandmother’s household as she had lived with them for a while too.
It was hard for them at first but once they saw the money adding up from selling it all on Facebook it got a lot easier.
Simplify for Less Stress
My recommendation if you are moving back home is to let go of as much as possible. If you don’t need it, don’t keep it.
Living with family is much less stressful when you aren’t drowning in stuff. If your family is not minimalist at least you can be!
As for their stuff? Lead by example and be helpful, but don’t push them to get rid of things before they are ready.
Learn to Want Less When Your Living With Family
It is natural, especially for women, to want to “nest” and make any new home just right. The tendency when you get into a new space is to want to buy new things!
To some extent, you may need some new storage and organizational solutions for your small space but try not to get too much new stuff.
Most likely you have things that will work in your new space just as well as they worked in your old space and keeping your decorations and furnishings the same will help you feel at home in your new situation.
When you do want to buy something make it a habit to stop and think about where you will put it. If you don’t have a place for it and a use for it, that item will be a burden instead of a joy. Don’t buy it!
Learn to find contentment in what you have and be creative with your existing resources. You will find your space and room to breathe is more enjoyable than all the stuff you can buy.
Make an Agreement on Finances Before Moving in with Family
Obviously, one of the main reasons you are moving back in with your parents is because of finances.
That is not a bad thing. Is it shameful to live with your parents? No! Moving back home to save money is a very practical thing. Saving money and realizing what you have to do is a mature thing to do.
In order to avoid any awkwardness or tension, it is important that you come to an agreement on how household expenses will be handled before you move it.
Plan on paying some form of rent and some contribution towards utilities, groceries, and other expenses of running the household.
If there is a mutual decision on this before you move back home it will be easier to avoid arguments about these things. The last thing you want to happen is for money problems to damage your family relationships.
Moving Back In with Your Parents -Share the Work
If you are moving back in with your parents, they shouldn’t have to do all the work around the house and neither should you.
The housework should be fairly distributed which means you will do your part without taking over. Figure out a plan so that both sides are contributing to cooking and cleaning duties.
For our situation, my mom and I trade off nights cooking and cleaning up the kitchen.
My parents do the majority of the yard work because they enjoy it and I do the majority of the house cleaning.
Of course, we help each other but knowing what needs to be done and who will probably take the lead in doing it helps us to keep the house running smoothly without anyone feeling burdened, overwhelmed, or judged.
Remember there is more than one way to do anything.
On that note, it is also important to remember that we all have different ways of doing things.
Even though I was raised by my mother we do a lot of things differently.
Sometimes you can learn from one another and sometimes you just have to respect that there is more than one way to get things done and let each other do your own thing.
Create Space and Respect It
As soon as we started talking about the move back home I knew that our area of the house would need to be set up in a way that we would have our own space to veg out and watch tv, talk with each other, and do our work at our desks.
My parents also created a space where they could hang out privately. We still have the living room where we can enjoy each other’s company but having our own spaces is vital.
We are both maintaining our own marriages and families after all.
It is a good idea to create an “apartment” within your part of the house where you can be yourself, watch what you want to watch, and talk about what you want to talk about.
You will have times to be together with your parents and times to be on your own.
Of course, you will still need to share the kitchen and maybe a bathroom, but make your room or area a place where you can sleep and chill and talk.
Respect Each Other and Prioritize Peace
When you are moving back in with your parents RESPECT and PEACE are the two things you will need to focus on the most.
Not just physically, but in all regards, it is important to respect each other space and ways of doing things.
You need to remember to respect your parents and not take over. They need to remember that you are an adult who will make your own decisions with your family.
You need to remember that they are your parents and they want to things their way too. They need freedom to be who they want to be and you may have to step back if you have a tendency to judge or control them.
Learn when to speak and when to keep silent. Try not to introduce unnecessary drama or take your stresses out on your family.
Remember to prioritize peace and respect. When your living with family it’s important to understand that we all need our space.
When you do this you can come together and truly enjoy each other!
Moving Back In With My Parents Has Made Me a Better Minimalist
While moving back in with your parents may not be what you want to do it can be a really good thing for everyone involved. We often ask ourselves why we didn’t do it sooner.
Moving back in with my parents has helped me simplify my life and possessions even more. I feel a great lightness and freedom knowing that I don’t have much weighing me down and my future is full of options because of the flexibility I only have because of the minimalist lifestyle!
I also feel that the decision to move back in with your parents has not been a step away from maturity but a step towards greater maturity because I have learned a lot about humility, patience, and respect.
We have also really enjoyed each other’s company and love!
If you have to move back home, for whatever reason, don’t look at it as a bad thing. It could be a great learning experience, a great way to lessen financial stress, and a great way to improve relationships and simplify your life!
If you have had to move back in with family how did you simplify? Do you feel like minimalism could help you? Please share in the comments below!